They say that once you jump world lines from the normal path, you’re more likely to fall into worse habits. I think it’s merely that once you’ve pushed it to the limit and seen how easy it was to survive, you’re less scared of that. Why should this worry me? I’ve survived much worse, dealt with stronger forces, and recovered my ship’s sails from more turbulent waters, so this is just another storm to pass.
The hair had to go.
This will be a winding series of whys and hows explaining how that seemingly insignificant weight was weighing me down, which is a funny thing to talk about on a purely physical fitness column, but I believe there are myriad crossovers between the many things we hold onto physically and mentally. After all, exercise is decluttering stores of fungible energy we have stored in our bodies in a controlled manner.
The thing that brought me the most joy the day I wrote this was watching these neon lights change color. There was just something soothing about seeing something so simple, abstract, and unique that framed the rest of the day in this weird sort of context. I don’t act in ways that are best for “my career.” I act in ways that are best for my health, physical and mental, rather than any financial health.
I think what frustrates people the most about their physical fitness goals is when the focus is on an ideal end goal. From my experience, when I focus too much on losing a certain amount of weight or looking a certain way, I’ll be more likely to give up. I’ll miss seeing how my stomach has toned because I’m too focused on the remaining belly fat. The problem is there aren’t immediate results in fitness.
Was it the child that coughed her throat out for most of the plane ride that made me feel sick today? The weather change? Not stuffing myself in good restaurants? I feel exhausted with the sort of head cold that would make a good excuse to not get out there and do anything at all, because after all, not feeling well is always a good excuse for not doing stuff, right? I don’t quite agree.
“This is the second time you’ve called out sick this month!”
“I know, I was feeling really sick, really tired, and just couldn’t-“
“Those aren’t excuses!”
Everything was black, except for outlines of her boss and their cube area.
RED, FLASHING, BLUE
She awoke to darkness.
Her sweatpants were covered in sweat.
The blanket was on the ground next to the couch.
It was 4:47 AM.
She had intended to wake early, but not this early.
“I’ll pass on the pizza, then.” Fitness is a choice that can come with a price that maybe we’re not willing to pay: who doesn’t like free pizza? “It was fine until I remembered why I don’t like eating pizza: my stomach was feeling gnarly for a few hours after that.” Sometimes it’s worth enduring certain short-term hardships for long-term gains. For me, the pleasure of eating pizza isn’t worth the pleasure of good fitness.